Sunday, July 23, 2006
aNg biLis Ng mga paNgyayaRi yEy!
Okay. We talked about it a while ago, and I guess we're okay now. Yey! At least minus one concern in my mind! Hahaha!! Though, it was awkward, and I felt like he was feeling uncomfortable. But I can't blame him, I felt that way too. Another thing, I felt like he can't wait to get off the phone. Felt like he doesn't want to talk to me, at least for now. But I don't know, I might just be jumping into conclusions and maybe his actions didn't even mean anything. Haay, but at least the agreement is already there. Hahaha!! Oh well, let's just see what will happen next. ;)
Oh, nga pala! There are no classes tomorrow!! Yey!! I'll have more time for myself! Hahaha!! But I know that somehow, that no class thing will work against me academically. But oh well, who cares…I'll survive…Hahaha!!
Raaarrr!! I hate myself for being sooooo lazy lately!! Waaaaahhhh!! *slap my face three times!* hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!! Grrroooowwwlll!!!
bEEN aLoNE siNcE7/23/2006 10:16:00 PM
+diamoNds aREN't foREvER+
two wEEk fRiENdship
This will be my first time to talk about him in my blog. So if anyone of you know what I'm talking about, then good for you. If not, then just follow on and hope that you will get it in the end. Hahahaha!! *yak! Ang bangag agad!;p*
Anyway, I found a new friend three weeks ago and I can honestly say that I had fun with him. He was nice, caring, understanding and those stuffs you notice when you have JUST MET someone. We talked, texted, and chatted regularly and I kind of got used to his presence after awhile. Then just last week, something happened that changed everything.
Well, it's sad, and he might not understand my reasons, but I felt like I had to say those stuffs. It was my obligation as his friend to say those things up front. At least that's what I think. And if he can't accept what I said and be stubborn about it, then whatever, maybe it's not meant to be. I just can't deal with a person that doesn't appreciate life's blessings. Cause for one thing, it's a big turn off for me, and secondly, in one way or another it makes me feel unimportant, and hello??! Who wants to feel unimportant right?? So obviously, I'll get pretty pissed off.
And one more thing, after saying my thoughts, he back fired by saying other stuffs (more of accused me of some stuffs) to me which was completely beside the point. But I actually found it amusing, childish and disrespectful. Amusing in such a way that I wondered if it was his way of making me feel bad, because if that was it, then it didn't work. Childish because I know he wouldn't have said it if I didn't say what I said, and that act was childish. I thought "ano toh, gantihan??". Anyway, it was a petty fight and by the end of that night he asked me to give him some "space"…so I gave him that and I didn't text him up until my cousin talked to me about it yesterday evening.
So I texted him and apparently he's still mad at me. So whatever, I have thought about it real hard and I gathered up my courage to text him first, but he reacted negatively, so I think I wouldn't be the first one to text him next time. But whenever he comes around and texts me, well, he's always welcome…I guess. I just don't think that I will warm up to him as easily as before.
It's a pity though to throw away the kind of friendship that we had just like that. It's depressing, but if he wants it that way, he shouldn't expect me to be the one to push myself to him. I think I have done my part, and he just refused it, so it just goes to show something. And one more thing, it's not the end of the world for me. Besides, there a lot of other things that I have to worry about and think about.
But in my defense, I just want to say that I don't expect anyone to adjust for me, but neither should they expect me to adjust for them. Seriously, I like someone for who he/she is and I accept him/her for that. I don't want anyone to change for me because if he/she changes for me, then he/she isn't the one that I liked or befriended. I have a point right?? *Haha!! Pinilit daw ba! Ano, naguguluhan ka na ba?;)* so I also expect my friends to accept me for who I am and not try to change me to fit their liking.
* ano pa? hmmm…ito na…I'll admit…ang laki sana ng pagasa niya eh…kaso ewan ko na ngayon. Medyo turn off kasi eh. Basta, bahala na, di din naman ako sure kung maguusap pa kami ulit. Basta ang alam ko, medyo hesitant na ako…sorry na,,ayoko lang masaktan ulit…prone ako eh…hehe…
** para sa'yo: kung mabasa mo man toh, ahm, ewan, sorry siguro, di ko toh gustong mangyari, it just happened. And I just wanna say that those two weeks had been fun…thank you…ingat ka nalang sa buhay…just like what you said,,marami namang ibang babae dyan eh…hehe… ;) good luck with those other girls…:p
bEEN aLoNE siNcE7/23/2006 06:47:00 PM
+diamoNds aREN't foREvER+
Monday, July 17, 2006
somE of thE thiNgs woRth wRitiNg about
Wow, it has been a while since my last post, and even though a lot of stuffs have happened to me lately that are blog worthy, I couldn't find time to sit down and write about it!! Waaahh!! My poor blog, getting neglected and all (see I even skipped my monthly mantra of changing skins!)! Oh, I'm so sorry blog, don't worry, I'll update you as soon as I can. Hehe… (Wow, I am so freaking weird right now)
Anyway, I'll try to write about everything that I can remember in this post…I'll try my best to not devote a whole page for a single event, like I usually do. Haha!
First up, is graviton…hmmm…I'm beginning to warm up to this class, I actually like the class now, though we're still undeniably quiet, I'm getting used to it. I don't really mind it that much, and sometimes I actually like it that way. Though sometimes when I talk to my seatmates, front mates, BACK mates, and 45-degree angle mates, I get easily identified! Hahaha!! Oh well, that's life…
Secondly, this last one and a half weeks, I don't know what got into me (well, actually, I do...haha! Labo!), I get easily offended and/or mad. As in with really small stuffs, I get annoyed and at one or two points cried. Though if ever those things happened to me in like a different time, I'll just laugh at it and fool around, but since it happened when I was overly (too much?) sensitive, I got irritated. Haaay, I was actually irritated at myself then for being irritated to almost everyone!! Hahaha!! But at least that phase is over now, I'm back to normal again, yes, my old foolish self…hahaha!! So to those people that I have been irritated to, to those that I shouted at, to those that I might have hurt….I'm so terribly sorry, please forgive me, I wasn't myself then. I mean, fourth year life can really get into the nerve of everyone, so much stuff to do, too much pressure…Haaay, add to that my momentary heart confusion during those days…hahaha!! (I know no one will understand that=p)
Third point, cat…wow, up to now, I still can't believe what I got myself into. I volunteered to be a cat officer, and now I'm a cat officer candidate, and it's so freaking hard to be one especially when it's not in my personality to shout at anyone without smiling or saying sorry (well, unless I'm really, really mad). But I really want to be a good officer, so I guess I just have to do my best and survive all those things. For now, one of the things that keeps me going is the thought that after all these, I'll officially be an officer and I will have the chance (and the pressure) of coming up with the best platoon in the batch (at least for the girls).
Fourth on the list is my elective, which is English journalism. Well, hmmm, I don't wanna say that I hate it, because honestly I don't hate it. But I'm not fond of it nor am I happy in it. I don't like it, that's it! I guess it's just not my thing to write, I'm more into the technical side (which is probably why I was in the tech streaming), and I like creating stuffs, forming stuffs. But since I don't know where else to go, I got into Eng. Journ. Haay, if I have a chance to change elective, I'll probably go to robotics or industrial chemistry, after all, I am good at chem. Haay, why didn't I go to I. Chem.?? I am so stupid, and now I'm regretting my decision…I'm such a LOSER!! Graaaarrr!!
And lastly, of course there's cheering practice. My most stress relieving activity, the only activity that takes a lot of my time and energy, but makes me real happy in doing it. I just love cheering; it gives me this certain feeling of satisfaction that only it can give. I don't know why, maybe it's just the thought that I'm doing it for the batch, for the honor and glory of our batch. But the only downside of it is the competitiveness each batch shows, I mean it's okay to be competitive but not to the extent that you begin to trash talk and say personal things. I'm not sure if my batch is guilty of such things, but as far as I know, we aren't. They may accuse us of a lot of things, but what I know is that we're just doing our part. Of course there is the want to win, to break the tradition, which is understandable. But if ever we fail, its okay, we did what we have to do. At least we know that we didn't step on anyone along the way. And at least we're not acting like we're sure we are going to win, that's different from saying that we WANT to win. Because of course, who doesn't want to win right?
bEEN aLoNE siNcE7/17/2006 06:53:00 PM
+diamoNds aREN't foREvER+